Life during the lockdown and one finds oneself turning to the online world for community, support, and solace. The pandemic is a global phenomenon after all, and it would seem by the swell of blogs and posts on social media that millions of people the world over are doing the same. Social media explodes with information, disinformation, misinformation, distraction, and instruction.
One of the most shared posts by the online artistic community tells me ‘use the pandemic and the new reality to write that song, that novel, that screenplay you’ve always wanted to’ but this merely serves to impose a feeling of guilt -after all learning to adapt to the restrictions is difficult enough without the added pressure of trying to summon the muse and create new music.
What if I have no new ideas at my immediate disposal to inspire new tunes or fresh ideas to share with other musicians, let alone an audience?
As somebody who enjoys making music, I often find myself getting lost in a series of questions when writing and producing. The overriding thought being “What value does this have?”.
It is easy to deter ourselves from creating art, and putting ourselves in a vulnerable position, simply by talking ourselves out of finishing or sharing a creation in fear that it doesn’t add anything of value to the world, or worse; detracts value.
Due to these thoughts and conversations within my own mind, I haven’t shared an entire song or idea for many months, perhaps even years now.
I live in a small house. High on a forested mountain. It rarely snows during the winter. I drive long distances to see the entire country sometimes. I eat alone in vast naturistic scenarios. However, I have a deeply loving partnership. I can only live openly as sex is a constant and powerful urge in my life.
When I called it a day about seven years ago, I was exhausted. Somehow I was emptied. I felt like I had already said and experienced everything. Since day one, music had always nourished me. How foolish was I to believe for a single moment that I could go on without it?
Sometimes I wonder if I like making people cringe or maybe it’s just an inevitable effect that comes with my need to overexpress my emotions and thoughts. I always thought oh well maybe I’m one of those who are seeking desperately for attention, but I figured that actually, it is more than just that. I just can’t control it, saying the things the way they are, if I hate my self, I’m gonna write about it if I’m ego tripping I’m gonna write about that as well. A bit of a drama queen mixed with a trouble maker with an honest desire to be better and be happy. And make the people around me happy, mostly with me.
To take my thoughts and put them into words helps me reach into conclusions, let my mind process, and move on faster. And I’m guessing doing it out loud for other people to hear is part of it. I’ve always appreciated artists that are being totally authentic, that are not afraid to write about themselves and their quirkiness and be honest. Let me, the listener, to get to know them better.
I’m Jesse, an independent singer/songwriter/producer. I’ve been recording music in different projects since 2009. Juliet’s Funeral, The Freddy Velcroman Expedition, and International Spies just to name a few. I’ve always been inspired by the DIY concept of garage rock and punk bands. I’m a huge fan of the ’60s and ’70s psychedelia and pop music.
I would describe my music as Alternative Pop Rock with explorations into Folk/Blues, Reggae and Jazz. I’m trying to find that someplace out there for my music, those ears to hear it and hearts to feel it. It’s been hard with such a wide range of influences. That’s when I realized I’d have to carve out my own corner here on this earth to fly my freak flag.
The years 2015 to 2017 were most probably the most crucial building block along my musical path. I’ve spent the two years struggling with a degenerative tendon disease leading to a derailing chronic wrist injury.
At first, I was misdiagnosed, and it took six months to understand why my wrists were escalating in pain. Since March 2015 I have routinely been a patient of several clinics, in and out of several hospitals, X-ray/Ultrasound/MRI scanning beds, frequented medical specialists and doctors offices around the city with minimal results.
It still affects me every day now. But I have new music released since and I’m moving on!
I am living proof of the regenerative power of muscle memory and artistic practice. Music and lyricism saved my life, and to these, I owe everything I have. Ten years on from a major stroke, composer Liam O’Connell shares his thoughts on life and returning from the brink.
There once was an expectation, that an artist would take a while to create an album. That was certainly the case for my first album “Headfiller”. Over the course of a decade it was finally released. My latest “Assortment” was created in a comparative blink of an eye. The levels of frustration, pain and joy seem to be similar though.