The years 2015 to 2017 were most probably the most crucial building block along my musical path. I’ve spent the two years struggling with a degenerative tendon disease leading to a derailing chronic wrist injury.
At first, I was misdiagnosed, and it took six months to understand why my wrists were escalating in pain. Since March 2015 I have routinely been a patient of several clinics, in and out of several hospitals, X-ray/Ultrasound/MRI scanning beds, frequented medical specialists and doctors offices around the city with minimal results.
It still affects me every day now. But I have new music released since and I’m moving on!
We’re all born incomplete and aspire for wholeness.
Thrown into this world at breakneck speeds, immediately socialized by our parents and guardians, who we trust as gods with our childish, wonder-filled minds. Once, we all believed our guardians and teachers and elders knew everything and could be trusted completely.
Alas, they were all once chucked into this world too, raised up by previous generations that may have often convinced themselves that they knew what life was all about. But they didn’t. No one did.
Songwriters and composers, lend me your ears/eyes/brains for 20 minutes here, this is IMPORTANT and critically timely. And it affects writers globally, if your music is streamed in the US. Please take time to read this and research a bit.
Hi, my name is Gus Goldsmith. I’m sixteen years old. I’ve been writing and recording songs in my house for about three years. It’s always just been me, a microphone, and as many instruments as I could teach myself to play. When I couldn’t find anyone to play music with, I did it myself. When I didn’t have anyone to publish my music, I sent it out myself. If I can get my music to mean something to anyone but me, then my goal is accomplished.
Much of my childhood is hazy in my memory because of its ever-shifting nature. The one thing that I can still recall with rather unhindered detail is finding my voice as an artist even when life itself was uncertain.
When my parents split, it was messy. The house foreclosed, my mom and I moved in with my grandparents four hours north, and my two older sisters stayed in Cincinnati with my dad. As my mom struggled to find a job and a sense of new permanence in Akron, my aunts and grandparents stepped up and helped with caretaking duties. I was eight or nine years old.
Kind of like how meditating gives us a focused space for our peaceful energy to flourish, having a vlog has helped me to take my connection with my listeners to essentially a sacred space.
I often think deeply about the whole picture and how can I as an artist create safe spaces during quality entertainment experiences. I want to give people a window into my songwriting process and other aspects of me being because we are all creating this world together. I get inspired often by intense things clouded by introverted struggles with no release but music. And I didn’t want just those intense songs to be all I gave the world. Perhaps a good analogy is that not cleaning for weeks results in a big beautiful cleaning. And weekly songwriting is like weekly maintenance cleaning.
I think, at heart, I was always a musician. I would always have a tune in my head and would spend my free time messing with an instrument or audio software. My heroes where rock stars. However, as I grew older, I felt pressure on myself – from both myself and from others – to fit into a certain expectation.
I wanted to live up to those expectations, so music became secondary. I pursued a degree in engineering to live up to those expectations, but I never felt like I fit in. I continued my musical development after classes as an outlet, but it wasn’t enough. Upon graduating, I realized that there was a difference between who I was trying to be and who I actually was, so I began a musical journey of finding myself.