by Goman Hira
I’m honestly just an awkward noodle that spends way too much time watching anime, 3d modeling, and making music. I feel that the arts are the best way for me to fully show myself to the world since words often fail me.
Listen to the album while reading the text.
Well, I have a project that I dropped about a month ago, titled “Say Nothing, Be nothing, Be with someone else,” and it holds a special place in my heart. On February 14th, my girlfriend dumped me as I was writing a song for her. That same day, I later found out that she had been cheating on me most of the relationship even though I had sacrificed much to be with her and help her see her dreams come true. She assaulted me in the club the day after and even burned a cigarette in my face. I still have the scar!
A month after that incident, my best friend Chris Smith passed away in a car wreck. I asked her to attend the funeral but to no avail. I was bitter, cold, desperate, and alone.
Noone would really try to hear me out or be by my side unless I had something to offer them, so I turned to my only friend, music. I had been listening to quite a bit of Scarlord, The Dialectic, Two Ton, Dance Gavin Dance, and Ghostmane around this time and had experience performing hardcore vocals (screams and growls) so I figured I could channel all of this pain into a small project and use it as a form of therapy.
Each song on this 5-track project holds a special place in my heart because of the words used. My family wasn’t too happy when I played it for them, but I didn’t care. This was something made for me.
I also began seeing a therapist around this time due to me trying to commit suicide with a friend’s pistol unbeknownst to them as a result of losing this young lady, so needless to say I was not in a good place mentally or emotionally.
I would sit in my studio and write nonstop. Originally, I had 15 songs meant for the project but scrapped most of them due to them being far too hateful for me to be comfortable performing in my town. Maybe someday I’ll release the rest of them.
The core of my sounds inspiration comes from Flying Lotus, Monte Booker, Dance Gavin Dance, Secret Band, Ronny J, Asking Alexandria, and XXXTENTACION. As of writing this blog post, I write, produce, mix, master, and do the art for all of my projects save for that one time Flunked Fiction did a cover art piece for me.
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